What happens when you lacto-ferment hashish?

Originally posted February 14, 2016 by Zayaan Khan at Apocalypse Pantry

(Editor’s note: British-origin colonial spellings have been changed to USAmerican-origin colonial spellings, so as to not confuse my U.S.-centric brethren and sisteren.)

Lacto-fermentation:  Lactic-acid bacteria thrive in an anaerobic environment and when food is involved they will ferment it into the most beautiful salty textures and flavors. It is supremely good for the gut, which is a solid basis for whole body health – from irritable bowel syndrome, dermatitis, curing anal fissures (common ailment women suffer, perhaps also why she won’t let you in the back door) to fixing your resting bitch face.  It’s also a preserving method, keeping your foods going for much longer.  A quick rinse and you can cook ‘em up or eat ‘em raw to get all the microbial muti.[1]

So here is a batch of purple carrots pre-ferment.  The whole-r you keep them, the easier it is to keep ‘em closer to their “raw” state if you want to cook them out of season – a superpowered preservation.  Whether you chop it big or chop it small, 1% of the weight needs to be salt and the rest clean water, not tap water, not chlorinated water, not funky water.  Sweet water is even better (here in the Cape, the water that the mountains sponge up seeps and weeps out as sweet waters).  Submerge your food: the whole process must be anaerobic.  A good idea is to spice the water; I used fennel seed, cloves, cinnamon, and a sizeable block of hashish.

A word on fartichokes:  Topinambur / Jerusalem Artichokes / Sunchokes (Helianthus tuberosus if you speak Latin) is a fucking great vegetable except it leaves you very gassy.

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